Tuesday, January 19, 2010

There's no place like home...

Okay so I was never the magically enchanted child. I wasn't the make up pretend princess in the castle games growing up. However I did looooove the movie the Wizard of Oz.

Except for the end. *insert shock and awed faces here*

I know, I know. I am sorry. However clicking your heels three times and saying, "There's no place like home". It may work for the movies and most people but for me it made me mad. (Don't believe me ask my mom.)

However, there is some idealistic person inside of me that is hoping and praying that it is just that easy. That it is just that simple.

Realistically? Well let's just say I love being home...but (there is always a but isn't there) it has been a hard adjustment for me. I worked outside of the home for the last almost 2 years. I have felt such guilt over these last two years. I have felt such shame for someone else raising my babies. However it isn't something I can change. Cue two years later and situations unfolding...I am home again. It is rough.

I wish I was all puppies and rainbows. I know I am lucky to be doing this at all. I love being with my kids all day. However... it is rough. It is hard finding my mojo again. It is hard just sitting sometimes for me. It is hard for me to be dealing with ALL of it alone again. I am thankful for it but it is rough.

I won't judge you if you don't judge me. I will never forget how lucky I am to be a mom. I will never be ungrateful for the opportunity to be a stay at home mom again. I really truly love it and there is certainly "No place like home".

But it is rough.

*Shay B*

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